What It’s Like For Your Partner When You Get Plastic Surgery
If you want to get plastic surgery, this could bring up some confusing feelings for your partner. I know—you’re thinking, “What’s he got to do with this? It’s my body! (and my money).” Yes, it is. But don’t you sometimes have thoughts and feelings about what your partner does to his body? Don’t you become angry if he skips a checkup or if he doesn’t eat vegetables for an entire week? Didn’t you feel a little left out when he came back from Vegas with a tattoo that he never spoke to you about? When you love someone, you feel like you’re a part of them and they’re a part of you. It’s only natural that your partner would have a strong reaction to you wanting to alter your body—the body he’s loved, as is, for a long time. Here is what it’s like for your partner when you get plastic surgery.
He wonders if he unintentionally caused this
Your partner may feel a little guilty, wondering if he somehow drove you to plastic surgery. He might look back on conversations you’ve had about your appearance, analyzing his every word to see if he ever made you insecure. Most good partners hope they make you feel so beautiful that you’d never dream of getting plastic surgery. Your partner could wonder if he didn’t do a good enough job of letting you know you’re perfect as you are.
He doesn’t want to encourage it
Your partner doesn’t want to sound too on board with the idea because he worries that then you’ll think, “Well has he always thought I had this flaw?” Admit it: if you announced you were having your breasts done and your partner immediately said, “Great idea! Love it!” you would be slightly put off. So your partner has to really measure his enthusiasm when you make the announcement.
He doesn’t want to discourage it
While your partner doesn’t want to throw a parade over the fact that you’re getting cosmetic surgery, he also doesn’t want to outwardly disapprove of your decision. He understands that this is your body and your choice. If you go through with the plastic surgery, he doesn’t want you to forever live with the insecurity that he disapproves of it. Again, he must be very measured in his response. If he looks awkward or uncomfortable when he responds to the news, now you know why.
His friends ask inappropriate questions
His friends are going to ask him inappropriate questions, like if your boobs feel or taste any different after you get implants. They’ll say things like, “You’re lucky—you got an upgrade!” and other comments that make him uncomfortable. This is another place he’ll have to be very measured in his responses. He’ll feel protective of you, and want to tell his friends to cool it, but he also won’t want to fight with his friends.
Some people think he made you
Your man knows that some of your friends and family are looking at him and wondering if he pressured you into doing this. He wants so badly to yell from the rooftops, “This wasn’t my idea!” But that, of course, could come off as him disapproving of your surgery, so he has to remain quiet, and accept the silent judgments he knows others are making about him.
People look at him like he’s superficial
If your plastic surgery is rather obvious, like large breast implants or an extreme facelift, your partner knows that strangers will look at him and assume he is superficial. They’ll believe that you had already had that plastic surgery before you met, and that he sought out someone who had been cosmetically “enhanced.” He’ll wish he could wear a sign that said, “I signed up for the natural version.”
He hopes you’re only doing this for you
Your partner deeply hopes you are truly doing this for you and nobody else—particularly not for him. Of course, he cannot say that because it could (once again) sound like he doesn’t approve of the procedure. But deep down your partner is thinking, “Please don’t spend all of this money and go through this painful procedure for me. I would feel terrible if we broke up and you had done this for me.”
He can become insecure
Real talk: you could be the significantly hotter one in the relationship after you’ve had plastic surgery. Maybe you were both naturally cute people before, but now you’re cute and you have a booty for days. Your partner might feel insecure that he won’t be attractive enough for you after you get plastic surgery. He may wonder if you’ll want to upgrade your partner after you upgrade your body.
He thinks you could’ve saved the money
If you and your partner aren’t married yet and do not share finances, then he can’t really comment on how you spend your money. But if your partner was planning on marrying you one day, he may be thinking, “We could’ve used that money for a down payment on a house or our child’s college tuition.” But if he says that, you might think he’s calling you selfish.
He wants to insist he likes you as you are
Your partner really, really wants you to know he likes you, just as you are. He is conflicted because, for his own peace of mind, he needs to know that you know he doesn’t need you to change. But he also knows if he pushes that issue too much, you could interpret that as him telling you not to get plastic surgery.
He wonders if he’s allowed to have a say
In the midst of all of this confusion, your partner will probably wonder if he’s allowed to say anything at all. Maybe he’s supposed to stay out of it. Perhaps when you talk about what life will be like after plastic surgery, he’s just supposed to smile and nod. It can be hard for men to know when they’re supposed to speak up or stay back when it comes to topics about female beauty.
He’s secretly terrified it won’t turn out well
Of course, he is! How could your partner not be worried about that? As far as he’s concerned, why fix what isn’t broken? But furthermore, why fix what isn’t broken if fixing it could actually break it? If you find your partner doing a lot of research on “before and after” photos from your plastic surgeon’s work, don’t be surprised.
He worries about your safety
People can forget that plastic surgery is still surgery—it’s built into the name. Your partner is probably worried about your safety going into this. He doesn’t want to worry you, so he may not say anything. Furthermore, he doesn’t want to accidentally imply that you’re being irresponsible for doing this.
He knows he’ll be a caretaker
There is a small part of your partner that is thinking, “So while my girlfriend is recovering from plastic surgery, I’ll have to clean all the dishes, make her dinner, walk the dog, and do all of the chores. All because she wanted a perfect nose.”
He might be happy but he can’t say it
Everybody’s a little superficial. Your partner appreciates physical beauty. He might be a little excited about your new breasts or your fuller lips. In a small way, he could feel like he hit the jackpot. He was happy to date you before the upgrade, and now he is being rewarded. But, again, he can’t say that.
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