MadameNoire
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Chrissy Teigen openly mourned the loss of her son, Jack, on Instagram as her intended due date draws near. The supermodel, who lost Jack halfway through her pregnancy last year, shared a picture captured during husband John Legend’s “Wild” video shoot. As previously reported, it was through the “Wild” video that the couple announced their pregnancy. She was ten weeks pregnant at the time and admits that she has been unable to watch the video since losing Jack last fall.
“These are from our video shoot for Wild in Mexico. I was 10 weeks along and out of my mind happy. I knew the video would take a bit to get together so thought it would be cute to share our news with the world through the ol’ classic hand-on-belly trick at the end,” Teigen reflects. “I could have never imagined what would happen over the next 10 weeks…not sure I’ll ever be able to watch that video again without sobbing but I hope he feels my tears and knows we miss him so.”
She went on to imagine what she may have been doing right now had things turned out differently and then expressed deep remorse over her decision not to look Jack in the face after delivery.
“He would have been here any day now – if he were like Luna and Miles, I’d probably be holding him as we speak,” Teigen shares. “I am so full of regret that I didn’t look at his face when he was born. I was so scared of seeing him in my nightmares that I forgot about seeing him in my dreams. I hurt every day from that remorse.”
While some might assume that grief associated with pregnancy loss gets easier with each day passed, Teigen confessed that facing Jack’s upcoming due date has been among the most difficult of days.
“This month is a rough reminder and to be honest, I thought the worst was over but I guess life and emotions aren’t on any sort of schedule,” she wrote before thanking fans. “Love you guys to pieces and am grateful for all your support and love. I firmly believe energy and healing travels through the night sky and I feel it, I promise I do. and I love you jack. I miss you so so much.”
Teigen’s other two children — Miles and Luna — were conceived through IVF. Baby Jack’s conception came as a surprise and the couple considered him to be their miracle baby. We continue to send our prayers to Chrissy and her family.
